SIREN - **

Dir: Andrew Hull. Stars: Eoin Macken, Anna Skellern, Anthony Jabre and Tereza Srbova

UK, horror, 86mins, cert TBC.

Released on DVD June the 27th by Matchbox Films, £12.99

Loved-up couple Ken (MacKen) and Rachel (Skellern) are on a sailing holiday in the Med with college friend Marco (Jabre). When Marco spots a signal from a small island, they investigate and find a bedraggled castaway. The deranged survivor babbles in a language they cannot understand, bleeds from the ears, then keels over and dies on deck. Fearing they will have trouble trying to explain this to local authorities in Tunisia (why?) the group decide to bury the man on the island and sail on.

However there’s someone else on the island, an attractive but confused blond woman named Silka (Srbova). Upon meeting her, repressed tensions among the group surface, Marco holds a flame for Rachel, Ken is jealous. The group swings from paranoia to uncontrolled sexual intoxication and fits of hallucinations.

What could be going on? Well the title of the film spells this out rather too explicitly; although the viewer may be thrown off by the hilariously misleading DVD cover shot. Practically begging to invoke the Trades Description Act with a photo shopped pic of a bikini-clad hottie brandishing a massive phallic knife. This drastically miss-sells the film, making it look like it will be a cross between DONKEY PUNCH and PARADISE LOST (aka TURISTAS). In fact director Hull is actually going for a moody and dreamlike atmosphere closer to Curtis Harrington’s 1961 obscurity NIGHT TIDE or Peter Weir’s picnic at hanging rock.

Hull’s background as an art director is extremely evident in the films strong visual style; it really is a very nice looking piece of work with rich colours, interesting use of mood enhancing lighting, and carefully composed shots. Hull was also a short film maker and documentarist of some renown, his work being largely gay and lesbian themed. There are hints of this in SIREN, in one scene Ken and Marco look as though they might be on the verge of a drunken tryst, but this ultimately is a plot strand that goes nowhere. More prominent are the Sapphic tendencies of Silka towards Rachel, but to be frank this verges on Pirelli Calendar high-gloss soft-core.

The film fails for two reasons. Firstly it’s extremely predictable. After the characters become stranded on the island due to the failure of their boat’s engine, the trajectory of the narrative is all too plain to see. Secondly the characters are unengaging bordering on loathsome. Ken is a muscle-bound jock dickhead who thinks he’s God’s gift. Marco is a sleaze cracking on to his friend’s girlfriend long before the Siren’s song works its baleful magic. Rachel is one of those girl’s inexplicably hanging out with an utter knob because he has great abs (in other words shallow). The trio are unattractive characters to spend time with before they selfishly decide to bury a dead castaway rather than take the trouble to sail is body to the mainland and allow him to be identified. Possibly this man has a family, but these self centered upper class twonks don’t seem to care.

Tragically director Hull died following a bicycle accident last year, which is a great shame as although not a success in its own right SIREN suggest the work of a filmmaker with great potential.

Stuart Barr.

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