Re: Bottom Five Films
Posted: Wed Aug 28, 2013 6:44 pm
For me;
1) In Fear - I know there's a lot of love for it. But not from me! Repetitive, unoriginal, and just plain daft, and the "improv" style of keeping actors in the dark and throwing them into unknown situations just doesn't work in modern movies IMHO. "Blair Witch" was the only one to ever pull that off. "Genuine Fear"? As Laurence Olivier said to Dustin Hoffman; "Try acting, dear boy...it's much easier." Plus the fact, that for the plot to make sense, one of the cast must be able to run at super-speed, have clairvoyant powers, and be able to warp time & space! The only film that I left feeling angry at for sitting through it... I'm fact I'm "hulking out" just thinking about it. RARRGH! WULFSTER SMASH!
2) Hammer of the Gods - Like a warmed over attempt at re-creating an ancient Britain version of "Game of Thrones" or "Spartacus"... but with less violence or sex, just the swearing. The scenery was nice ... but the endless walking-across-hillside montages made it feel like "Lord of the Bloody Rings"! Not good. And nothing is guaranteed to piss me off more than freeze-framing a film just before a major event! I know it's a budget issue, but sheesh!!
3) Dementamania - It's not that it's a "bad" film. The acting's good, the imagery is great, and the riffs on office politics is spot-on. It's just that ultimately, with all the set-up, nothing really happens! If it had gone full-on "Falling Down" mode (which is where I thought it was going) it would have been fantastic. But alas, that was not to be...
4) Dark Touch - At the beginning, this looked like it would rock! But then we got the constant pouting and tantrums from Ronan Keating's daughter and the jaw-dropping stupidity from the adults. Young girl traumatised and suspected of foul play? No problem! Send her to a birthday party and leave her unsupervised! No wonder people were giggling at that point! Just daft! The ending is bloody dark though!
5) Toss up between "Missionary" (Too slow and the wife is wetter than a Octopus Leg-Warmer), but "Haunter" just clips it for me. Abi Breslin and Steve McHattie are both good, but given the rather grim subject matter, the glossy Disney version of the afterlife and the slow pace just didn't do it for me...
Before being labelled a miserable git, those were genuinely the ONLY films I had issues with. I totally dug the other 21 movies that I caught during the weekend and it was a great experience as usual.
1) In Fear - I know there's a lot of love for it. But not from me! Repetitive, unoriginal, and just plain daft, and the "improv" style of keeping actors in the dark and throwing them into unknown situations just doesn't work in modern movies IMHO. "Blair Witch" was the only one to ever pull that off. "Genuine Fear"? As Laurence Olivier said to Dustin Hoffman; "Try acting, dear boy...it's much easier." Plus the fact, that for the plot to make sense, one of the cast must be able to run at super-speed, have clairvoyant powers, and be able to warp time & space! The only film that I left feeling angry at for sitting through it... I'm fact I'm "hulking out" just thinking about it. RARRGH! WULFSTER SMASH!
2) Hammer of the Gods - Like a warmed over attempt at re-creating an ancient Britain version of "Game of Thrones" or "Spartacus"... but with less violence or sex, just the swearing. The scenery was nice ... but the endless walking-across-hillside montages made it feel like "Lord of the Bloody Rings"! Not good. And nothing is guaranteed to piss me off more than freeze-framing a film just before a major event! I know it's a budget issue, but sheesh!!
3) Dementamania - It's not that it's a "bad" film. The acting's good, the imagery is great, and the riffs on office politics is spot-on. It's just that ultimately, with all the set-up, nothing really happens! If it had gone full-on "Falling Down" mode (which is where I thought it was going) it would have been fantastic. But alas, that was not to be...
4) Dark Touch - At the beginning, this looked like it would rock! But then we got the constant pouting and tantrums from Ronan Keating's daughter and the jaw-dropping stupidity from the adults. Young girl traumatised and suspected of foul play? No problem! Send her to a birthday party and leave her unsupervised! No wonder people were giggling at that point! Just daft! The ending is bloody dark though!
5) Toss up between "Missionary" (Too slow and the wife is wetter than a Octopus Leg-Warmer), but "Haunter" just clips it for me. Abi Breslin and Steve McHattie are both good, but given the rather grim subject matter, the glossy Disney version of the afterlife and the slow pace just didn't do it for me...
Before being labelled a miserable git, those were genuinely the ONLY films I had issues with. I totally dug the other 21 movies that I caught during the weekend and it was a great experience as usual.